Eye contact supersedes all ways of interpersonal communication. As little as a slightest variation in pupil might transmit a more powerful signal than a bodily movement. Whether it’s talking to a woman or a serious business deal every move should be considered like a game of chess. One slip might cost you the last chance you have.
Eye Contact
Changing world demands slight variations of eye contact protocols, these small powerful facts make eye contact rules stricter than ever. Some of these protocols work independently and some of them depend on the situation or the gender or the position of the person, even culture.
Not only for getting on with the fair sex but also eye contact is key to every other day-to-day affair.
A good reader of the eyes is half the master of the body language.
Always Have An Eye Contact
First up its always important to make eye contact with someone you are taking to. Whenever you meet somebody for the first time keep a good eye to eye contact while greeting them or introducing yourself. Men with fair eye contact fare well with others, they come across more confident, honest and enterprising. To women a slightly prolonged eye contact is a clear sign of dominant and confident male.
Initial firm eye contact at a job interview can have a powerful impact on the interviewer. Any hesitance or avoiding eye contact may not turn the situation into your favour.
If you are shy or not skilled at maintaining prolonged eye to eye contact learn, practice and improve.
Glance On & Off
- Don’t engage eyes with someone for more than few seconds. [Usually 3-4 seconds].
- Shift your glance off the person’ eyes naturally, try not making it look awkward.
- Reconnect eye contact again after that.
- Don’t shift glance too far from the persons face, keep it around them, i.e. within shoulders.
Looking Up & Down
Don’t run your eyes up and down or left to right over someone while you are speaking with them. It’s awkward and rude act that forces the person to think that you are scanning their body and consider yourself superior to them or something else!
Don’t Stare at Women’s Chest
Your confidence must not spoil your image. Gazing at a woman’s breasts while having a conversation with her is a terrible mistake. It sends a bad signal that you are not familiar with social protocols and etiquette especially about women. A man tending to look at women’s cleavage comes off as a sexually oriented person. Hold it over!!
Smile With An Eye Contact
Subtle smile with an eye contact reinforces your connection with the person, especially when you are communicating with ladies or strangers. Practice smiling enough so that you look natural, don’t overdo. a grin on face during eye contact will earn you more trust from another person.
Smiling during a speech or a presentation is very important. People should get a reason to listen and look at you; smile is the only way to do that. Imagine a rude stiff face during a presentation; you certainly want to get out of there, no matter how significant or urgent the topic is.
Smiling with slightly open lips is more attractive than smiling with closed lips.
Blinking ¦ Slow Blinking ¦ Frequent Blinking ¦ No Blinking ¦ Closed Eyes
- Always blink naturally, do not control blinking, but improve if you blink abnormally.
- Natural blinking is okay during an eye contact.
- Fast blinking shows nervousness or something is wrong with your eyes.
- No blinking means a stare. It is unnatural to not blink. A little pause in blinking is sign of interest or more attention to you.
Talking with your eyes closed? You might come off as less confident person than a blind one.
Eye Contact Level
First level yourself with the person. Same eye level creates a better connection between two people; you will be in better position to convey your message to other person and be understood.
- While talking with a person with short height maintain a distance so that the line of sight is not as steep and you are not tool tall for them.
- Bend your knees while communicating with kids and maintain a fair eye contact.
Don’t Look Too High or Too Low
Look at the roof or floor while conversing with someone and they might take you as a fool who does not know how to behave. Keep a decent range of your gaze. Move your eyes within that limit.
Don’t Stand or Sit Askew
Always stand or sit in front of the person, it gives you the best eye contact. If you are talking with someone at an angle, position your body towards them. While sitting during a business meeting or a friendly gathering turn your torso and head in the direction of the person you are speaking to or asking question to.
While you are called from behind, turn completely and walk few steps to face them. It shoes respect towards people.
Eye Level While Walking
Most of the people walk with their head and eyes looking down. Keep your head up and glance almost horizontal [you can observe models walking on ramp]. Don’t overdo else you will look like a robot! Also look sideways and around you. Make random eye contact with people who pass by you.
Eye Contact In Intimate Relationship
Eye contact is the foundation of long term romantic relationships with your spouse or partner. Here the duration is longer, glance should be soft and seductive. Your intention being amorous maximum connectivity is required. The blinking will be automatically slow and gaze will linger on. This is the only relationship where eye contact works just like oxygen.
Eye Contact With Your Boss
Staring at your boss could mean a derogatory glance, therefore be careful not making too much eye contact. The person in authority expects a humble and gentle look from you, any error in eye contact might prove fatal for your job in the long run. If the boss is a female you need to be careful not to offend her with awkward eye contact.
Eye Contact Culture
Making and holding an eye to eye contact with the opposite sex varies through different cultures. Usually women living in Muslim countries will avoid direct eye contact with stranger men. Any man from a different culture might easily make a mistake and possibly offend a lady.
Unless you are familiar with person or from within a family a more direct eye to eye communication should be avoided.
It is therefore advisable to learn about different cultures and the code of eye contact with opposite sex.
